Let myself slip a little

There is no end to
guru's perfect grace

Wandered away a bit. Let myself slip a little, back into unchallenged "mini-me," unchallenged contraction as the malas.

Fear, ack. Situations I fear arise, and I'm consumed! I picture myself stepping into the fear as the fire of purification. It is so uncomfortable, but it is my way, now.

I am not going back. I focus my consciousness on the contraction, on the malas, which I can do only because of guru's grace. Which I can draw to the moment by this focus, and by my devotion to the practices and my life as a sadhini.

I can see without guru's grace none of this would be possible at all.

Thank you thank you thank you...