Monday, January 16, 2017

The scenery moves

I am not moving. My body and the scenery moves.

Thursday, January 12, 2017

Fragrance of the Heart

Breathe in deeply the fragrance of the Heart
Revel in the light of the Supreme Self
Breathe out gently the benevolent power of the Heart

~ Gurumayi

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

The quality of Nandi

Nandi Temple in Khajuraho

From an interview with Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev

Nandi is a symbolism of eternal waiting, because waiting is considered the greatest virtue in Indian culture. One who knows how to simply sit and wait is naturally meditative. Nandi is not expecting Shiva to come out tomorrow.* He is not anticipating or expecting anything. He is just waiting. He will wait forever. That quality is the essence of receptivity. Before you go into a temple, you must have the quality of Nandi – to simply sit. 

You are not trying to go to heaven, you are not trying to get this or that – you simply sit.

Some Nandi's have one leg ready as they wait

People have always misunderstood meditation as some kind of activity. No – it is a quality. That is the fundamental difference. Prayer means you are trying to talk to God. Meditation means you are willing to listen to God. You are willing to just listen to existence, to the ultimate nature of creation. You have nothing to say, you simply listen. That is the quality of Nandi – he just sits, alert.
This is very important – he is alert, not sleepy. He is not sitting in a passive way. He is sitting, very active, full of alertness, full of life, but just sitting – that is meditation.

Brihadiswar Temple Tamil Nadu 

Meditation essentially means the individual person is not doing his own thing. He is just there. Once you are simply there, you become aware of the larger dimension of the existence that is always in action. You become aware that you are a part of it.
Even now you are a part of it but becoming aware that “I’m a part of it” is meditativeness. Nandi is the symbolism of that. He just sits and reminds everyone, “You must sit like me.

*NOTE from Jana: Nandi is Shiva's "vehicle," and is traditionally found at Shiva temples. His qualities are related to the qualities of Shiva, who is often portrayed as the master yogi sitting in meditation. Nandi is also considered a deity in his own right.

Sunday, January 1, 2017

Made for this

I return to the mantra after socializing for a few hours.

A feeling of relief in mind and body, and the sweetness like a fragrance in my mind.

I no longer fear I have lost my way, or that I am incapable of real progress.

The mantra makes my being sing. I am made for this.

Friday, December 30, 2016

Fear her when

been through 
so believe me when 
I say, 
fear her when she looks 
into a fire and smiles.


I shall not slip

A battle! I shall not slip

If I slip, I shall not fall

If I fall, I shall not break

If I break, I shall not stand again

I find Thee at the bottom of every defeat

I find Thee at the heights of my angel heart soaring

Where we are one

Forever one

A soul must find its home

Nothing will stop me. Ego, delusion, fear, long frozen feelings, judgement, haughtiness, once mighty decisions (with or without a solemn oath).

I can wait. All this comes and goes. It will subside.

I love this.... more than my entire life, more than endless moments of constant identification and attachment. More than hope and good faith. More than story. My story. Many stories. Many lifetimes.

I love only this: my return. All of this will finally slip away, and I will be what I love. I will know myself well.

A soul must find its home.

Thursday, December 29, 2016

Letting go of attachment

I find that I have greatly underestimated how much letting go of my attachments to the world would lead to breath-taking progress in my goal of enlightenment.

As always, it is grace.

Monday, December 26, 2016

Awakening me

So recent, I remember.

Shakti and bliss would start in me. And I sprang into action!

What does it mean? How can I keep it? How can I increase it?

How should I think about it to control it, make it larger, keep it from going away?

What should I be doing? What if I don't do it right and I lose it??


Now the shakti and bliss comes, and I breathe deeply. I open myself to whatever will happen.

Thank you for this shakti and bliss. 

Perhaps it is my Guru sending me shakti, awakening me.

Be awake. Be alive. Be now. Become more transparent with every breath. Feel your heart open.

And I breathe deeply.

Sunday, December 25, 2016

Every day is magic

When I was a girl, I wanted the magic of Christmas to last all year long. It was painful when it was over, and life became flat and empty again for another long year.

I knew then what I know now. There must be a way to be filled with happiness and experience a full life and purpose every day. I learned this is true, and receive it every day because of my Guru.

Thank you. Thank you.


Thursday, December 22, 2016

The huge fear

The huge fear, soul sucking fear kept chasing me around. Fear that seems to have existed before I began.

I felt it arise, and turned. I surrendered to it. All of me, every part, willingly consumed by the fear.

I saw beyond it the freedom from it that was to be mine.

More fear, please.

More fear.

I want to be free.

Forever and ever...

...closer than close.

I have two gurus. It wasn't my idea.
Normally this is a HUGE no-no. I am always the exception.